The insurance you pay for on your phone can/does one of two things for you. If you pay for the "bundle" insurance, you have coverage against accidental things that may happen to your phone (ie: lost/stolen, dropped in water, dog eats it, etc). You also then have a "lifetime warranty" on the phone as well- provided none of the accidental things have happened to void the original warranty.
When you pay for your car insurance every month, and you get into an accident, you pay a deductible. It goes the same way with phone insurance. You were asked to pay the $90 DEDUCTIBLE because your the damage to your phone did not fall under the specs of a warranty claim. If asked to pay $90, it is safe to assume the retail cost of your phone is anywhere between $199-$299. Now, let me ask you this: To replace your obviously damaged phone, would you rather pay $90 or $300? If you said $300, that's outrageous. Paying for the monthly premium allows you to replace your phone for a HUGE discount off the retail price WITHOUT extending any contracts.
As for the "like, similar, REFURBISHED phone", keep in mind that a REFURBISHED phone has been looked at by technicans and has (hopefully) had any glitches repaired. That's a lot more trusting than getting a new phone out of the box untouched. In addition, even if your REFURBISHED phone DOES have glitches, you will STILL be covered under your lifetime warranty (provided you pay for the bundle, and not just the 'insurance' under your protection plan).
It sounds like you feel ripped off more or less because you didn't understand how the insurance works in the first place. Fortunately for you, Asurion AND T-Mobile both state their policies re: filing a claim on their websites. In additon, Asurion also provides literature fully detailing their terms and condtions upon request and/or upon enrollment of the Premium Handset Protection program. I suggest you direct your anger to the source of the problem (your ignorance surrounding the policies/cause of the damage to your phone) and not to a company(s) that will pretty much bend over backwards to help you if you keep your cool and follow correct procedure.