I am a single mother. My son's father has never paid child support. He admitted paternity in 1991 AND 1998, but ran shortly thereafter each time so he couldn't be forced to pay child support.
In 2007, I was very ill and on temporary disability for a long time. Due to the severe cut in pay, I got behind on my bills. We almost lost everything. My sister found Michael Dimsey (my son's father) on the internet and told me. I found his address and filed for the much needed child support.
Mr. Dimsey contacted me and asked if we could meet to discuss this without involving lawyers. I agreed.
At the meeting, Mr. Dimsey explained to me that he's remarried, is a stay at home father and has a business. He said that his wife gives him $100 per week spending money and he would be willing to use that as child support, plus help with any additional expenses.
Fast forward a couple of weeks, to when we were actually in court. Mr. Dimsey denied knowing that he was my son's father and also said that he wouldn't give more than $50 per week in child support.
After the paternity test results came back, we had to go back to court for child support. Mr. Dimsey was found to be voluntarily underemployed and imputed income at $25,000 per year. I was also found to be underemployed and was imputed income at $45,000 per year. My income level was more than fair. Mr. Dimsey's income level was from 2001, which he claimed was the last time that he worked full time. Child support was set at $99 per week with arrears going back to the date of filing.
Mr. Dimsey has not paid regularly, nor has he paid anything towards arrears. He is living in an expensive home, driving new cars, living up the good life.
One month after the original child support order, Mr. Dimsey filed a request for modification to lower his support, plus wants joint legal custody. Since he has only seen my son twice in the past 10 years (once at lunch in December and once at the paternity test), joint custody is most definitely unwarranted.
I created a blog to discuss this issue. www.freewebs.com/deadbeatdadsucks/ Everything posted on that blog is verifiable by court document, which I have. Mr. Dimsey hired an attorney to try to have the website removed, saying that it is defamation of character. According to the legal definition of defamation of character, if I was posting lies, then yes, it would be. However, everything posted is the truth.
We had the hearing for Mr. Dimsey's request for modification. He told the mediator that he only wanted to pay child support based on what he actually makes because he's a stay at home father watching his two year old daughter and his wife's children before and after school. The mediator told him that everything was already taken into account and his request would be dismissed. Mr. Dimsey then told the mediator that he would like a continuance in order to seek legal counsel. I immediately objected, saying that Mr. Dimsey has had two months since HE filed for a modification of child support to find an attorney and if he could afford an attorney, he most defintely could afford his $99 per week child support plus $25 per week towards arrears. The mediator was sympathetic but explained that she could do nothing about it, since the law does allow continuances for legal representation, however misguided and unfair it is. She also advised Mr. Dimsey that this is NOT an excuse for not paying child support and that he needs to make complete and on time payments.
I cannot afford an attorney. I live in NJ, at 40% of the median income for a famly of three. My son is now 16 years old and has NEVER received support from Mr. Dimsey until he was forced into it. Even then, it wasn't complete.
Anonymous
Anonymous, New Jersey
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