To respond, though you offered no help and basically called me a liar:
1) I am the fiancee of her ex. He has full custody of the kids. We have lived together and I have helped him to support the kids for more than 4 years now. Before I met him, his mother was helping him. He and I both work full time. I love the kids to death and would adopt them if she would give the approval.
2) My fiance didn't "tell" me anything to make me think he is a victim. I am writing from first hand knowledge based on what SHE stated to ME.
3) When she was in the army, she received her own paychecks. She lived on base. My fiance lived with the kids off base and stayed with them so she could do her army training. He had been working in FL but she said she wanted him to move closer. She then cheated on him with her boyfriend. She moved out and in with her boyfriend and the boyfriend's kids. Her allotments were given to her in her paychecks. She sent none of it my fiance for their kids. She used it for her own living and put it into her own bank account. My fiance was told by her lieutenant at the time that she could be sanctioned, but he'd be better off moving back to FL with his family since she was refusing to support him. Note that since I've never been in the army, I may not use the perfect phrasing, but I am not a liar.
4) I'm not sure where you get off saying he is some loser who wants to live off her. Before she joined the army, he was the one working and she stayed home with their son. She told him he didn't make enough and had him quit decent jobs in the past. Since she left the army in 2007 (because she said, to me, that she made the choice to do so) she's been unemployed for more time than she's worked, and she voluntarily quit the one job she had.
Yes, I know I've chosen to be with him and to make a family. Just so you know, we have no kids together because I want to make sure his are provided for the best we can. I'm just angry and frustrated that their own parent is so unwilling to live up to her responsibilities, and this was an avenue to vent that and perhaps seek help. I see you have no intention of helping, only to bash what you perceive as what "can't be true" and "not making sense." No wonder so many deadbeats get away with it...it's always someone being greedy, or wanting to live off the ex, not someone who genuinely struggles to provide for kids when one half of the family decides not to contribute. Such is life, I guess...