Well Melissa you never fail to come up with some very freakin' hilarious stories. I must thank you again for starting my weekend off with such a great laugh.
I think all of your "problems" will be solved with you just doing one simple thing. You need to carry the following sign so that any restaurant knows you are coming. It needs to say the following.
My name is Melissa/Fajita Girl/Alice
I think that every woman is a psycho and jealous of my looks. If you are a woman and even attempt to look at me without bowing down and worshiping the ground I walk on I will do the following.
1. I will make outrageous requests
2. I will Complain to the Store manager
3. I will Complain to corporate..over and over and over and over and over.
4. I will continue to come back repeating steps 1 to 3.
5. I will post my story on the Internet so that other people can see how glad they are that they do not work at a restaurant in Florida and have to deal with me.
If you are a male you don't have to bow down to me, because your mental capability does not allow you to comprehend my simple sentences.