• Report: #425281

Complaint Review: Staples

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  • Submitted: Tue, February 17, 2009
  • Updated: Wed, July 15, 2009

  • Reported By:Spring Hill Florida
Staples
staples.com/kmart Port Richey, Florida U.S.A.
  • Phone:
  • Web:
  • Category: Liars

Staples Store wouldn't take back a printer Port Richey Florida

*Consumer Comment: The trolls were out that night...

*Consumer Comment: me too!

*Consumer Comment: You actually responded to this?

*UPDATE Employee: You are a close minded jerk.

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I purchased an HP printer from the store, and after about a year and a half, I decided I didn't like it anymore and wanted to bring it back. I went to the store and attempted to return the printer, and the manager told me it was too long after the purchase. I told him I always spent all kinds of money on all of his pens, erasers, dog food, paper, fish, etc. He had the AUDACITY to tell me I couldn't have done such a thing because the store didn't sell paper anymore. I asked him if he was calling me a liar and he said yes, and I said "Oh yeah?", and he said "Yeah", and I said "Oh YEAH?", and he said "YEAH", so I challenged him to a winner take all arm wrestling match. He said he wasn't about to make a fool of himself and that I should leave the store. I went down each aisle and told every customer I encountered how I was treated and not to do any business with the store because it was all a sham when they said they cared about the customer. The store manager became aware of what I was doing, and ordered his guard dogs to attack me. I fought them off with my bowstaff, but one of his ninja associates threw a star at me, slicing open my forearm. I said "Ooooowww that REALLY hurt!", and before I knew what was happening, he sprayed me with noxious gas, paralyzing me. I awoke several hours later in a jail cell somewhere underneath the store where I was water boarded and forced to watch reruns of Three's Company. I managed to coerce the guard by offering sexual favors, and upon escaping, sirens went off and a trap door was released, sending me into the bowels of the store's warehouse, where I have lived for the past three years. Please, anyone reading this, save me. They have an associate who bears a striking resemblance to Joseph Fritzel, and I have reason to believe it's a robot clone of the criminal himself. Please, someone save me.

Thehamburglar
Spring Hill, Florida
U.S.A.

This report was posted on Ripoff Report on 02/17/2009 05:26 PM and is a permanent record located here: http://www.ripoffreport.com/r/Staples/Port-Richey-Florida/Staples-Store-wouldnt-take-back-a-printer-Port-Richey-Florida-425281. The posting time indicated is Arizona local time. Arizona does not observe daylight savings so the post time may be Mountain or Pacific depending on the time of year.

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REBUTTALS & REPLIES:
0Author 4Consumer 0Employee/Owner
Updates & Rebuttals

#1 Consumer Comment

The trolls were out that night...

AUTHOR: Robert - (U.S.A.)

Anyone who thinks that this was even close to a real report got "punked" by the Trolls.

Obviously this story if false, for one Staples does not sell Dog Food or Fish. Although putting "Dog Food" in the product search at the Staples site gets some interesting results.
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#2 Consumer Comment

me too!

AUTHOR: Ashley - (U.S.A.)

Don't worry man! I finally escaped from one of their holding cells last week. I used a rubber band, my dinner spoon, some rocks, and a bottle of shampoo to fashion some low grade TNT. After blasting open the door I fought off the robot clone by tossing sand in his eyes.

They were not expecting me to spring up through the store and strike so decisively. The manager didn't have time to let loose the dogs before I escaped in to the parking lot. Luckily there was a hum-vee parked outside with a guy that suspiciously looked like chuck norris. He told me to jump in and we drove off to his secret bunker. I'm hiding there as I write this to let you know that we will find a way to free your from the staples camp.
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#3 Consumer Comment

You actually responded to this?

AUTHOR: Gruppa - (U.S.A.)

Bigslama912. Really? That's pretty funny. Guess there really IS one born every minute.
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#4 UPDATE Employee

You are a close minded jerk.

AUTHOR: Bigslama912 - (U.S.A.)

First of all it is on the back of EVERY RECEIPT that all electronic items have a 14 day return policy with or without a receipt. This is true for ALL business not just staples. If Staples allowed people to return their printers whenever they wanted, especially for a dumb reason like "I don't like it anymore", Staples wouldn't be in business.

SECOND! - That is just flat out rude to go to every customer in the store and share your opinion. This is ignorant and you WERE flat out wrong on your reasoning. Next time before you make a scene in a store I ask you to take 2 seconds and think because it's obviously something you don't do very often.
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