Ladies and Gentlemen, and Prospective Victims: My name is Dr. Herchel E. Sawyer, Jr.,
and I live in Grove, OK. I am age 63. In the late Winter, Early Spring, 2009, A company
I had never heard of before, was busy advertising cellular telephone contracts in Grove, OK, a little resort community, here in North East Oklahoma. In the Grove SUN newspaper, they were pushing two year service contracts for, and/or in concert with, ALLTEL, a National cellular service provider. ALLTEL is DEFUNCT now. And that is relevant to my RIP-OFF Report. At the moment I was seeking a reliable agency for cell service, and I thought I wanted to go the contract route, rather that stay with the Pre-Paid plan I had with Virgin Mobile. So, one snowy day, I drive to their retail store, on South Main Street, and walk in to their place. I sat down at a desk, and speak to a very polite lady, who hands me some paperwork to complete, and I take 5 or 6 minutes to do this paperwork.
After I do the paperwork, she does something with my paperwork, and she shows me a cell phone, hereinafter known as "handset". It's generic looking handset, nothing fancy I assure you. The lady takes FOUR HUNDRED of my dollars, really, four hundred and change, and gives me a NEW ( I guess it was new...but with these people, who knows ?) handset. She gives me a copy of my paperwork, and sends me on my merry way.
I immediately attempt to use my new cell phone ("handset"), and I can't get service,
so I drive and drive, until I get "bars" which indicate that maybe I am getting carrier
signal. So, I pull over into a parking lot, and dial a number. Then, my bars go away.
Being a bright and intuitive man, with a modicum of sense, and being level-headed,
I take my automobile in the opposite direction, which is North. Again, I drive, and drive,
and I get no bars. No carrier signal.
Now, I know that there is ONE ( and exactly ONE) cell tower in this hick town, and I
know it belongs to Mister Verizon. So, with the astute mind of a Big City college
educated middle-aged Squire-about-Town, I head in the direction of the cell tower,
on 18th street. Shortly, I am sitting, in my vehicle, parked 100 feet from the tower.
And guess what? That's right ! NO SIGNAL. Now, I understand what is what with
cell equipment. As a matter of fact, I actually know everything there is to know about
cell equipment, paging equipment, you name it, if it has to do with RADIO COMMON
CARRIER technology.....I know about it. There's a reason why. And it isn't important
right exactly now.
So, now, as I said, I'm sitting 100 feet from the cell tower, and I am getting no
signal. I mean, not a bar. Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, that tells one thing:
I have to get to the proverbial ( and perhaps literal) bottom of this conundrum. You
like that word, "conundrum" ? Thanks! I love words. ( If you run into a word you
don't know, I think there's a mini-dictionary above in the tool-bar....good luck)
But what I don't love, is paying out the ying-yang for a service that I do not
receive. And that just brings me to the core issue: I had been RIPPED OFF.
RIPPED OFF, BY AN OUTFIT CALLED "RUSSELL CELLULAR". Ever heard of Battlefield, Missouri ? Yeah....neither had I. Until then. So I get on the phone ( I mean, my VIRGIN MOBILE cell phone (handset)). I call Russell Cellular at their BIG TIME Corporate Office in the thriving metropolis of Battlefield, MO, Green County, Missouri. I ask to speak to some one that can explain what in the unmitigated HELL is going on with my cell service.
Next thing I know, I'm in my car, driving back and forth and hither and yon, trying
to get a signal. Yes, the moron at RUSSELL CELLULAR is actually asking me to
do this. And I, the apparently bigger moron, is actually doing this. But, only for
Then, I tell the guy, "just stop. this is STUPID". I can see that this is all horse
feces, so I tell the guy I'm hanging up, and I go over to the Russell Cellular
I am not really greeted by an affectionate and respectful bunch, once I make it
known that I am there because I've been RIPPED OFF, and that I don't appreciate
being RIPPED OFF.
Well, she, the so-called manager, gets on the phone with some jerk-off in the
tech department, tells him blah, blah, blah, droning on and on, what can we do,
what the heck this, and what the heck that, and they don't know, and they don't
have the answers and it's not their responsibility....WHAT ??????? Say that again ?
It's not your responsibility? I've had this "handset" for two days, and I can't make a
call and it's not your problem ?
I leave, and go home, and I get on the phone with RUSSELL CELLULAR. And this time,
they play the badger game. You know, they toss me around from extension to
extension, from this guy to that guy......and nothing.
Next day, I drive back to the retail store, and now, there's a new manager. And
this manager is one of those " screw with me at your own risk" types of people;
you know, like she perhaps might have spent her formative years in a women's
I get nowhere, but kicked out of the store. YES. I am literally kicked out.
And it all went down hill from there. Here's the punch line, folks: ALLTEL, I believe,
was acting in concert with RUSSELL CELLULAR, to bilk, defraud, steal, gouge, and
RIP OFF some small town types. Well, I ain't no small town kind of a guy. I've been
baptized by FIRE. The steel in my soul has been tempered by BIG TOWN spit, sweat,
and piss, and by working sometimes 18 hours a day to make people wealthy, 'cause
that was my job. Making them rich. But don't piss down my back, folks and then
tell me it's raining.
I told RUSSELL CELLULAR I was on to their little scam. I wrote to agencies. Nothing.
Lately I communicated with law enforcement agencies. I even talked to the Battlefield
Police department. If you want to call it a "department". I thought they were going
to LAUGH at me.
I wrote to State Representative Mister Eric "Mr. Big" Burlison. Well, Rep. Burlison
ignored me like I had AIDS. That little trip cost me four months of my time. I
then talked to the MISSOURI STATE SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE. Guess what ?
NOTHING. They must have thought I had a Helluva nerve, to actually bring a
real nuts and bolts problem to their doorstep. Anyhow, I'm sure they were
just too busy with their fish and goose soiree', to help a fellow citizen.
Now, I am going to the Department of Justice in D.C., Criminal Divison. We'll see
where I land with that effort.
On a detective thriller note.....I found out that ALLTEL, as I was being sold
that "contract that never was", was being ABSORBED by Mister Verizon....
You see? You get it ? RUSSELL CELLULAR was using that buy-out as a
smoke screen to scam us. ALL OF US. It was not brilliant. But, it did
keep us in the fog long enough to get our money.
RUSSELL CELLULAR: If they had any guts, they would just cut the crap,
and hold up armored cars. At least I could half-way respect a crook with
guts. RUSSELL CELLULAR: We will get you yet. You'll see.