At first when stumbling across this site I was hesitant. But I am finally at the point where I will try absolutely ANYTHING that will help. Ive read over some of the claims on cys and find myself disturbed. Some in which I at first glance thought I could relate to, until I continued reading.
Venango county cys hasnt always been my enemy. Im one of those very few out there whom know that the whole keeping children safe and healthy is a difficult task. However, the tabels flipped over on me and Im reaching out in hopes that SOMEONE out there can help.
Two years ago my children now age range from 16-9 came to me with the secret that the man whom wed trusted in and loved had been a monster in a mask. I quickly and without questions removed my children from my home to safty and contacted cys. Feeling me against the world, I continued to help our local enforcement pin the monster whom hurt my babies and at the time Id learned hurt many other. Im sure that many of you can just imagnine the disbelief and shock we were all in. Learning hed skipped state AND had alies names. Perhaps right now Im being judged because I was nieve and or foolish enough not to see this comming. I understand the ignorance of those whom DONT undrstand. Anyway, as the story unfolds...I stood by my children and those other victims of his including a neighbor girl and a family friend. We together emotionally held one another through a very difficult trial. In the end I was satisfied that he was behind bars,on megans law and could never hurt again. Now was my task to rebuild and repair all hed destroyed in our lives.I began treatment with many agancies not only for myself but my kids. I also begged cys not to close me that I needed somewhere to lean ( I feel now may have been a mistake on my part) . Needless to say we were in the process of healing when I became romanticly involved with a childhood friend. Jan 8th of 2012 ...Little did I know that in 99 had been charged with a indecent assult charge or did I understand the severity of the actual charge. Needless to say...like vegas we wed...after rekindling a love that had been lost many years ago. I now understand Im prob being frowed upon ( as your reading this) but plz continue to read. In april the kids were placed under a "safty plan" and my husband was to take offender classes and therapy. In which he complied...I myself entered programs as well. But although cys was closely monoriting and my parenting never once was questioned. April 13th they were placed with their father on a safty plan that they not have contact with my current husband. I now understand that victims of sexual abuse are valnerable and more likely to be hurt again. NOT that I believe my husband would hurt them but theres always that WHAT IF in the back of your head when youve been through what we have. CYS asked that the husband leave the home till progress was made for family reunification..in which Ive now complied but they ignore emails, phone calls etc...not only from me but from aganciesthat I work with currently and from my therapist .I dont know why this is okay? After learning that my three teen girls share a room that maybe measures the size of a jail cell at their fathers, that cys and childline have both been called adressing the abuse and situations under their fathers roof. Idk why they are trying to deem me....unstable! My children all want to come home to me and cys had voiced that the only thing needed to be done to do so was for me to have my husband removed and to keep him from returning ( DONE!!! ) so why still is this continued? They voice things to my daugthers that are unacceptable, that are out of line and Ive got a great concern where that is. I think maybe its boiled down to the fact that we need a new social worker ( i dont deny that there is a need for cys in our lives, but a new worker whom hasnt been thru trial with us and have this conflict of interest) may be just what we need? I also believe that since Ive complied with cys they should atleast start overnight weekend visits...there are absolutely NO formes saying I cant have the kids on my own. But ...our cys worker enables my abusive gas lighting, manipulitive ex husband to have much power. I never once denied him from being a parent..it was his choice not to do so till now. And Id very much like therapy so that he and I could co parent. But until NOW hes always refused , having very little to do with the children till we became in the public eye. Ive been told that now that he has custody *(according to him thats how he sees it) Hes gotten agancies help with many things, and looks forward to income tax return. Sad that he sees our children as valuables....I dont want anything other than them in my arms. This was also an issue for divorce with him. He wanted all we had including the house in order for him to sign. all I wanted was my kids! So I sadly find myself venting through this post ( NOT my intentions) But I realize there may be voids or spaces in the information needed for anyone to help...even offer a shoulder or some advice. Plz do ...Ill be waiting patiently.....positive and neg feedback welcome. Ive been through it all...nothing intimidates me.
Ty, a momma with a ton of missing pieces in her heart