Wachovia I told them this is WRONG and if you write BAD CHECKS you can get ARRESTED but if you do it ELECTRONICALLY it is OK. Dahlonega Georgia

Debbie,

I'm sorry if you misunderstood my posting. I never dogged you for going back to your husband, nor did I indicate that you were not in difficult circumstances. I'm not 'making excuses' for anyone, merely pointing out how you can correct the situation so that you don't have to be put in this position again.

You want to make the financial institution responsible for something that they have no control over. You and your husband opened the account, subject to certain terms. The bank is not married to your husband, cannot control what he chooses to do, nor the state of your relationship. Let's try explaining it this way: You give money to a friend, with the understanding that it would be repaid, and she in turn gives that money to her husband to go pay a bill.

Several days later, the electric company turns off their service 'cause hubby went to the casino instead of paying the bill. Now, who is responsible here? You, because you loaned her the money? The electric company because they turned off the service? Should you write off that money because her husband misused it? Should the electric company turn her service back on because they SHOULD have received that money? Now, you give her money again, situation repeats itself. Again, who's the one that should shoulder the responsibility?

Again, my sympathy for your situation, and my condolences on the loss of your mother. Please investigate the ways that you can avoid this situation happening again with the bank, possibly even closing the account that you are experiencing difficulties with and opening a new account in your name only.

The bank would not help the first time it occurred nor the second time. It makes me mad because the bank does not seem to care. My husband claims he gave the atm card back to the bank when he put the money back the first time so what was I to do.

As for taking my husband back, my mother was laying in ICU at the hospital dieing and had been disabled for two months and had been in the hospital for over one month. So I was having a very difficult time coping with all else going on. When you are about to lose your mother and have to deal with planning your mother's funeral your life gets turned upside down and you make rash decisions and sometimes not in your best judgement.

What is wrong is wrong no matter how you paint it or candy coat it. So for you to make excuses for it to be my responsiblity puts the blame on someone else and not on who really should be held responsible.

All parties are equally responsible for the funds (and activities) of a jointly owned account. Just as they can come after you if you choose to co-sign a loan for a family member or friend who fails to make payments, when a joint owner (and I use this term because it doesn't matter if it's a spouse, child, friend, or some stranger off the street, a joint account is a joint account) overdraws the account, all parties listed on that account are responsible for getting the money back into it.

As for the electronic vs written check charges, welcome to the 'new age' of banking. Remeber when the law passed that allowed checks to go through instantly, instead of the normal 2-4 days that it used to take? Financial institutions, not wanting to lose the income from the overdraft fees, graciously awarded their customers 'overdraft protection', often in amounts of $300-$500 per account. They'll pay your drafts (or electronic transactions), as long as you agree to pay their charges. Read all the ROR's on this subject.

One way to avoid this situation is to request, in writing, that electronic transactions be treated as ATM charges, with no overdraft protection in place. If you attempt a transaction without funds available, the card will be turned down. Another step is to NOT share an account with someone that you don't trust with your money, spouse or not. Per your own post, your husband did this once, and you didn't take steps to avoid it happening again, so how can you blame this on the bank? I would be upset if my or my husbands transactions were turned down, but I know that I can trust him not to overdraw our account. If for some reason we did incur an overdraft, it would be a mathmatical mistake, caught within a matter of hours and corrected.

I feel sympathy for your current situation, but feel your anger is misplaced.