I'm not sure how, but somehow my private phone number (that I'm getting rid of at the end of this month) has ended up on numerous telemarketing lists.

Naturally, you can only imagine how thrilled I was to FINALLY get a call from Capital One this morning at 9:30am, waking me out of a dead sleep. (I work second shift and I'm the antithesis of 'morning person'.) As soon as I realized who was calling and that they wanted me to accept their 'Platinum Visa Card with a low indroductory rate of only 5.9% that will go up to ONLY 14.9% after 6 months' I asked the idiot on the other end of the phone if she had any idea her employer was plastered all over the internet as nothing but a huge scam.

'Well, no ma'am, I don't.'

To which I reply, still half asleep, 'They are and there's no way in HELL I'd take a card from you people, ' and hang up the phone.

That was call number one. Call number two was from our friends at First National Credit. They wanted to give me a 'major' credit card for a one time 'processing' fee of 239.00 which, according to our little expert on the other end of the phone was, 'just like every other credit card charges'.

When I questioned the seemingly high amount of money wanted up front she assured me that it would actually SAVE me money in the long run because that fee covered all other charges for renewal or annual fees or anything else I would be charged.

I asked her what bank the card was from and she told me that they would pick a 'suitable' lending institution in my area to issue me the card. I asked her what 'major' credit card they wanted to give me and she told me that it would depend on the local bank that would issue me the card. I also asked what kind of interest rate and she again told me that it would depend upon the bank. So then I say to her, 'You want my checking account information, don't you?'

'Yes, ma'am, but only for verification purposes, we're not going to take any money out.'

'Bullsh*t. How stupid do you think I am? I know damn well you're going to take money out and you'll probably do it twice.'

'No ma'am, there's only the one time processing fee of 239.00 and after that we don't have authorization to take any more money.'

I explained, not quite as patiently as I probably could have, that yes, if I were to give them authorization once, they'd have authorization forever and could wipe me out. She wanted to argue, and being the type that loves a good argument, I bit and we argued.

Then I decided to have some fun and let her think I was being reeled in by her 'slick' marketing tactics. I conceeded and let her give me the spiel and I played dumb and pretended to buy it.

Then came the finale, she asked for my checking account information and I told her to hold on while I got my checkbook. She told me to take my time.

30 minutes later I'm finished getting ready for work and I hear that annoying 'off the hook' signal coming from my phone.

I guess her idea of 'take your time' and my idea of it are a tad different, but I bet they don't call back.

Have some fun with these scam artists, folks! Enjoy yourself while wasting their 'valuable' time. I think I'll start using their postage paid envelopes to send them copies of the rip-off reports about themselves. The best part is that the company foots the bill.

Enjoy!

Pele

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