My 15 year old daughter had started cutting herself in December 07. Her behavior had gotten to the point to where she would tell us no when asked something of her. She was lying, name calling her brother, being disrespectful to adults, not following rules and doing her chores. At the end of February of 08 she had become violent by breaking my finger, tried to push me through a window, biten me, clawed me with her fingers and ran away in the blizzard at night and hitchhiked to Franklin which is about 45 minutes from home. Both Belmont and Franklin police were involved. We got her home the same night. Next day she cut herself again and ran her wrists full of blood down some of my windows, across the siding of my house, and let her arm bleed infront of other children. We had called her counselor and let her know that our daughter needed to get back into counseling.
We did not get ahold of authorities because my husband's mother was dying and did not have much time to live. We did not want our daughter to not be able to attend her grandmother's service. On March 5 we lost my husbands mother and then on March 20 my daughter decided to act out once again. She had been told to do chores and she did not want to follow the rules. She had disrespected her brother so she got 1/4 tsp of chili powder in her mouth. She was asked to clean it up and told me no. She then grabbed my wrist and had her nails dug into the wrist and would not let go. A friend went behind her and brought her to the floor very calmly. As my daughter went down she told me I was a "f***ing c**t, and that she wished I was dead" I tried to spank her with my open hand and pants up, but she turned around laughed at me and quoted "did you think that hurt" . My daughter ended up getting a spanking on the bare buttocks with two open hands. She was asked to apologize and said no, so she got spanked again. My daughter apologized and then went into her bedroom and cut herself again with a spiral notebook.
I called the police, there was no bleeding or anything. They took her to the hospital and had her stay for social reasons. DCYF got into the picture and removed her from the home saying her safety was at harm. I have never before spanked my children. I have always used other forms of discipline like taking the tv, ipod, computer, phone away. DCYF has had my daughter for three months. My daughter keeps changing her mind that she wants to come home, then she doesn't. She is playing both sides. I am appealing this decision, because I do not feel I neglected my daughter, I disciplined her for her poor choice of behavior. These people have my daughter believe that she did nothing wrong by disrespected her elders, assaulting a parent, and her brother. I feel we are getting the raw end of the deal. And yes DCYF feels that they want to reunifie families, how is this when we see our daughter once a week for three hours supervised. My daughter was able to stop the calls between us.
I also have simple assault charges against me. DCYF does not care what they put parents through. Anyone that can offer me some help and opinions I would really appreciate it
Belmont, New Hampshire
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