Dignity Memorial...funerals etc Rosedale Funeral home, martinsburg, W/VA allowed someone else to plan and carry out a memorial service for my husband; allowed someone else to have a stone memorial made to him. Martinsburg West Virginia

my husband died March, 2014 after several months illness. he was 81.we were married 35 years! we live in upstate NY. his children live about 1 hour away.  His daughter (50+)unbeknownst to me until a week before, planned a memorial service for him in West Virginia where he was born. Rosedale planned and provided whatever she asked for.  She told me approx. 1 week prior to the event; stated that it would be $250, and would i pay for it.  I said i would.(husband was born in WVA near martinsburg and has family therel  neices and nephews. 1 elderly sister.  We had a large memorial for him in upstate nY where all his children, granchildren and greatgrandchildren live as well as work cohorts, friends and neighbors.  his sister attended that service thanks to her daughter and son-in-law.  i paid for the event which included lunch for  all attendees, flowers, graveside service etc. .MY husband was ADAMANT that no funeral or memorial be held.  but we did it because the grandchildren were not allowed to see him when he was so ill as he was septic ..they have very young children.).

Anyway, the funeral home in W/ VA called me to pay the bill and it was $2600.  I paid it to keep peace in the family.(stepchildren whom I helped raise..now in their 50's.)  i found it difficult to believe that ANY funeral home would not establish NEXT OF KIN (ME, wife of the deceased).  and told them so at the time.  I was NOT INVITED TO THE SERVICE.  Yesterday  morning, my step-daughter sent me a text message...the first contact since the Memorial service here April, 2014. (I have NOT heard from any of his 3 children since the memorial).  She wanted me to know that she had a stone memorial made for the grave site. she has not consulted me prior to doing so.  i called the Rosedale funeral home in martinsburg to be sure that I was not paying for the stone. and to ask why i was not informed before the decision was made. the man at Rosedale said, oh are you the next of kin?  we cannot do anything without the next of kin's approval.  I am not approving this.  and i believe that Rosedale needs to get it's stuff together. I am so furious that i am not coherent.  sorry.  i am pleased to have this opportunity to say how they acted to get money.....and without consent.